Last week the lines for Streamyx's data transfer were so bad i decided to send them an e-mail asking nicely (yeah, right!) what's the problem is all about. It reads somethin' like this :

From: firdaus

To: streamyx@tm.net.my

Sent: Tuesday, March 25, 2003 06:42 petang

Subject: Bad service.

What's wrong with Streamyx service lately? I've been using it for 3 months since January and i am so happy with the service. But in the middle of March the streaming of data have been slow. What's wrong? I thought you were supposed to be efficient and fast with the service?

FYI, i feel cheated to have to pay RM88 per month if the service are not as advertised. Please get your act together, and i'll be your most happy customer.

Thanks for reading this.

-FIRDAUS-

The e-mail was actually encrypted with the patented 'Censorship kills the fucking star' software. If you guys decipher it thoroughly it actually will read something like this:

From: firdaus

To: streamyx@tm.net.my

Sent: Tuesday, March 25, 2003 06:42 petang

Subject: Bad service.

YOU FUCKING SHITHOLES!, YOU THINK I PAY RM88 MONTHLY SO I CAN GET A SLOW ASS SERVICE? FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT, I SWEAR IF I SEE ANY OF YOU STREAMYX GUYS ON THE STREETS I'LL RIP YOU NECK APART!!! ARGH!! TELL ME NOW, HOW CAN I DOWNLOAD FROM KAZAA IF THE STREAMING IS 1BITS PER SEC? FUCK YOU GUYS.

-FIRDAUS-

So there. Thank god the email was encrypted right? ;)

So yesterday, they finally decided to reply to my e-mail, and here is the reply from them.

From: StreamyX Support

Date: Thursday, March 27, 2003 09:58:41 AM

To: firdaus

Subject: Re: Bad service.

Dear sir,

At the moment the speed of downloading are still a bit slow due to our server problem, which in the process of rectifying and also since the international link is prone to heavy traffic usage due to a lot of people around the globe accessing international websites for news on the recent war. That is why you will find to surf a local website such as bluehyppo and tmnet a lot faster than international website. However, we assure you the effects are only temporary.

We suggest you try to reconnect whenever you experience the slowness in browsing in order to gain a different set of IP address. This will help you to gain a more stable connection. We will notify you once we have fully resolved the problem. Thank you for your patience.

Regards,

ON CRM

StreamyX SupporT.

Now bear with me, this might not be true but i could've swore they use some sort of encryption software too. Let us name it 'The lame ass who cares about the customer' software. I've tried to decipher it, and this is my result. Remember, it might not be true, but who cares right?

From: StreamyX Support

Date: Thursday, March 27, 2003 09:58:41 AM

To: firdaus

Subject: Re: Bad service.

Hey you!,

Yeah you, with the funny face. What's up with the complain e-mail? Who cares about the service, huh? we sure don't, and we are the service provider dammit!. You think we care about your money? Of coz we do. That's why we spend it all on advertisement and not the service. 'For what?' you ask? So that you will be blinded and hypnotised with the flashy light and open up your wallet to pay for our bad service willingly.

Sucker.

So we deliver lines like congested traffic usage, people around the world accessing the news for war coverage, problems with the server and use big words like rectifying, servers, and prone, just to make sure you are still in the dark as to whom you should put the blame to. Just remember, we will deny every word if you try to blame us. In fact we will send you 100 malicious (another big word, mind you) worms and virus to your pc and put the blame on international hackers. We dare you to try.

Remember to keep on sending the money, and keep 'em coming. And we will keep on giving lousy services.

Yours truly

Anonymous tech guy.

****************************************

...and now for something really different...

Dead cells

i'm too tired lately,

running around without a reason.

keep on going faster

but spreding my self too thin,

please

let the next light be red

and not green,

So that i have a reason

to stop

for a moment to enjoy

this crazy race

we call life.

-QRTZ-

March 28, 2003

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Arggg!!! Letihnyer.

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